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How can couples reverse the buildup of resentment once they notice it?

13.06.2025 16:44

How can couples reverse the buildup of resentment once they notice it?

By wanting to truly understand each other, despite feeling unheard.

By taking turns talking.

By giving up the notion that someone has to “win” or that anyone loses by saying “you are right”, “I am sorry”, or “I can do better.”

Why is my ex trying to provoke an argument with me?

By learning to validate what the other is feeling. “I can absolutely see why you feel this way.”

By internalizing that responding with kindness is strength, not weakness.

By deciding to stop with the criticism and the nagging and instead say thank you for everything you do for me. Thank you for loving me.

Have you ever had a weird experience immediately following the death of a loved one that made you think there is an afterlife and that the deceased person was communicating with you?

By resolving to listen with curiosity rather than defensiveness.

By keeping in mind it’s OK to have different opinions and different experiences, and they both matter in equal measure.